How to deal with hurt

I have tackled emotions such as Guilt, Fear and Anger in previous BLOGs. This week I wanted to talk about Hurt (as an emotional feeling).

For the purposes of this BLOG the definition of hurt is ‘to cause mental pain or to cause distress.’

So many people start their journey in therapy with a sack load of negative unhelpful emotions. They may understand that their thoughts and emotions are flawed or that the hurt that keeps coming back to bite them happened decades ago, yet still it rules their lives and holds them back. Removing any negative emotion is hard. We get into a cycle of feeling, doing, being and it is hard to break that cycle; it can be broken though.

You know that when a negative emotion is unhealthy and keeps on causing you issues it is time to let it go. Easy words to use I hear you cry. I have a few handy tips on how you can try to get over being hurt:

  • Take into account the full picture. If someone has hurt you by for example shouting at you. Try to understand the full picture – behind every act is a positive intent (even if that positive intent is not directed at you). Ask and find all perspectives.

  • Understand your own limits. Are you emotionally sensitive? Work on ways to make yourself less vulnerable. You can learn how to relax a little by meditating, practicing calming breathing techniques or doing something you love. Get yourself in a positive frame of mind.

  • Take responsibility. Although it may be another person or situation that hurt you only you can chose to allow it to hurt you. Make the choice not to allow yourself to feel that pain anymore, be firm with yourself.

  • Forgiveness. Forgive the person for their hurtful deed or hurtful words. Forgiveness is just like letting go of a balloon and watching it float away until it is a dot, then nothing….. It’s gone. Don’t dwell on the past

If you still cannot remove hurt from your life and it is holding you back or impacting those around you we can help. Why not try out Time Line Therapy sessions.

We have a special offer for three sessions £80 (normally £120). For more information contact me at

You can find more information on Time Line Therapy at!time-line-therapy/c1baj

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